That One Word to see me through.

When I first felt God suggest my One Word to me, my immediate thought was that it was actually me, and I was scared of deciding on one this year. I have mulled it over for about a month or so now, and after the first feelings of trepidation, I'm actually a little excited about it.

You might be shocked at my choice. I know I was. There are so many quotes on Pinterest and the like telling us to do the very opposite of my OneWord. It carries negative connotations. It implies weakness.

But then God whispered "I am your hiding place and your shield. I hide you in the shadow of My wings. I hide you in My shelter in time of trouble, and lift you high on a rock. In My presence I hide you from the plots of men... Hide My word in your heart."

So, after a long, hard, horribly hurtful year, where the Lord told me that He would fight for me, I just needed to be still (and quiet), and having done all, to stand... I feel he is giving me permission to hide in him this year. To take refuge, rest, and replenish my strength.

So, that is my word.

Hide.

Dive

I don't like diving.

I like climbing, and to a point, I enjoy being up high. I even like abseiling. But the idea of jumping off a height without a safety rope freaks me the heck out.

I'm like that in real life, too. I can climb up and up and up, and talk, and talk, and talk, and have idea after idea after idea (and yes, they are all awesome) but when it actually comes to then jumping off the platform and doing it...

I freeze.

I have about 4 books in the planning stages, all sticky notes and arrows and margin notes.

And then I think that I could never really write a book. Not one that people would actually enjoy, anyway.

I get all excited about reforming my home management (*snortlaugh*), and have it all planned out in my head, and charts drawn up.

And then I don't have the right bathroom cleaner, or something comes up and I can't start on the Monday, or something just doesn't go the way I planned, and I can't begin until it's right.

I love my quiet time when I decide to find the time to do it. I love my podcasts that teach me so well, and the revelations the Father gives

But I'm too frightened to let go of the control and just free fall dive into Him headfirst.

This is a Five Minute Friday post, where a bunch of blogger flash mob for 5 minutes at the same-ish time (lets call it a 'round') with no editing allowed.

The rules are simple...

1. Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.
2. Link back to Lisa Jo and invite others to join in.
3. And then absolutely, no ifs, ands or buts about it, you need to visit the person who linked up before you & encourage them in their comments. Seriously. That is, like, the rule. And the fun. And the heart of this community..

Opportunity

So the new year has begun, and with all of my One Word deliberating (I still don't have one) and No Junk Food promising (I start Monday), I quietly vowed to blog more.

Enter Five Minute Friday to kick me off, because I'm pretty sure I've forgotten how to write.

This year is bringing many new opportunities for Adam and I.

A new house. With the opportunity to begin new routines and connect better with the children.

A new writing opportunity for me (there'll be more about that later). Adam has been wanting me to do more of this, and I have let my perfectionism get the better of me, I fear.

A new church. And the opportunity to sit and heal, and perhaps, if called, step into ministry again.

A new calling... or is it just the old one, repackaged?

Last year was painful. And long. And lonely. It was the reason I didn't blog, as I wasn't sure I could keep the pain to myself, and I wasn't in a position to reveal the details. So it was an opportunity to dive into the Word, and a closer relationship with God despite what was going on around us. Or was it because of? Probably. Maybe a bit of both.

Whatever it was, I am so grateful that God causes everything in our lives to be an opportunity for us to grow and mature... to glorify Him, if only we let it. Of course, we can go the other way. I was determined to run to my Mighty Fortress, not away from it.

So I am thankful for the opportunity of this new year to get to know everyone better. To write more. To delve into God and His calling for Adam and myself.

__**__

This was a Five Minute Friday post, where you set your timer and write for 5 minutes, no editing allowed.

The rules:

1. Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.
2. Link back to LisaJoBaker and invite others to join in.
3. And then absolutely, no ifs, ands or buts about it, you need to visit the person who linked up before you & encourage them in their comments. Seriously. That is, like, the rule. And the fun. And the heart of this community..

AP v DP... WTH?

So today, right, for the first time ever, in a moment of not thinking clearly about the ramifications, I posted a link on my Facebook that made me feel better about the way I parent, and holy crunchy mama, people lost their ever loving minds.

Let's be blunt here. The crunchy mamas are very vocal. And those of us who aren't so earthy tend to, well, not be, because we are afraid of being pummelled to death with steel cut oats. To be brutally honest, I find a lot (but certainly not all) of what is written by them to be sanctimonious and harsh. Their way is the right way, and to hell with anyone else who has come to different conclusions to them, because they obviously don't love their kids as much as they do.

Of course, that's not wholly true, and I'm sure 8 times out of 10 they don't mean it to come across that way. But the perception of it, when put up against the way that I parent (I immunise, feed on demand so long as it wasn't half an hour ago, I birth in a hospital, I let babies cry it out, I don't care if the kid drinks formula so long as it eats and grows, and the only time we co-sleep is when we wake up in the morning and discover someone snuck in during the night) it certainly comes across as looking down one's nose.

What happened today on my Facebook was that in complete reverse. And yes, to the crunchy set, it was sanctimonious and harsh. But it was the writer's opinion, and while it made sweeping generalities, it was so interesting to see the attachment parents completely forget they do the same thing. Suddenly, it was not ok to find fault or disagree with the way someone else does things, or imply (heavily or otherwise) that the "detachment parent" obviously doesn't like their kid. I've seen fb statuses from both camps bemoaning how tired they are because the baby won't sleep, or nearly tearing their hair out because the two year old HAD. to. be. held. ALL. DAY. LONG, and it's a freaking long running parental joke about the many ways a child can sleep in the big bed that puts the parents in horizontal yoga poses. It doesn't matter if they are AP or DP or whatever... you empathise, because parenting is freaking hard, and at some point, all parent's will wonder what the hell they've gotten themselves into. Everyone wants to do a good job at it, and just because this time the writer is a parent who doesn't AP, it doesn't make their opinions any less valid. A person's opinion, is just that: their opinion. You don't have to agree with it.

When my friends who practise attachment parenting post links, I tend to either not read them depending on which paragraph they chose to c&p, or, if I do, I usually decline to comment because hey, let's be real; my opinions, regardless of how well I researched, are not going to sway your opinions which I'm absolutely sure are just as researched. The way you parent is completely and totally 100% up to you. And the same goes for me, and to be frank, I really don't see the point in me telling you how I think you're doing it wrong. I am no perfect parent, what right do I have?

Listen; my AP friends have fantastic kids. My "DP" friends have fantastic kids. You know what? Why the hell do we even have to have labels on our parenting? Why can't it just be oh, I dunno... parenting?? And while we're at it, how 'bout we all agree that unless we see the kids obviously suffering from neglect or abuse, we keep our damn noses out of each others business, and quit trying to make the other "side" (seriously?!) see 'reason' and change their ways.

I now have the lyric "we're all in this together" stuck in my head. So true. It takes a village, and all that, y'know? All types. If we can just learn to suggest, when the situation arrises, rather than tell and browbeat, I think everything would be a lot more harmonious.

/rant.

I have no more babies left

So I was planning on transitioning Cora into her big girl bed when we moved into the new house, but it seems, despite my insistence she stays small always, she has completely ignored my desires and gone and become two and a half. With a mind all of her own, no less.

Of her own accord, Cora has taken to sleeping on the queen mattress with Bethany, and to all intents and purposes, it seems to be working. At least, I'm not putting her back into her cot umpteen dozen times a night. It's been about three days now, and she's napped there on her own as well. She's more content to be put down there, and that usually means she's more likely to go to sleep rather than muck around for a few hours.

*sigh* I am not totally devastated, but I do wish she had waited for when I had decided to move her. My poor heart feels a little rushed. I haven't taken the cot down; at least that I can control, and I will stick to my original plan. On the upside, the absolute cutest thing has come out of it... now, when she wakes up, she always comes into where I am and says "I awake now." To which I then have to say "you're awake now?" and she replies "yeh." And then we snuggle. So it's all good, really.

I just won't be rushing potty training anytime soon.

Write them on your doorposts

So, as some of you may know, Adam and I are currently building a house. It's getting very exciting, because the slab went down a couple of weeks ago:

We had to keep it wet for about a week while it cured. 

They piled sand up around it, and we just kept it filled with about 2 inches of water.

Of course, this made what we are living shrink exponentially. In case you aren't aware of our living situation, this is it...

Two 20 x 9 foot shipping containers (plus one for the toilet/shower/laundry) for our family of 8. The kids sleep in the grey one there on the left, and the white one is our lounge/kitchen/master bedroom.

I've been sleeping on the couch since December.

Up until now, while we had no idea how long anything was going to take, we just sort of put up and dealt with the cramped conditions. Once the slab went down, we all collectively lost our minds and had a gut full. For the sake of everyone's sanity, especially Troy's, we set up our 6 man, three room tent for the two older boys so they could have their own 'rooms' for the next two months. The kids haven't been to sleep before ten for the last two weeks or so, and we are all so very tired.

The verandah poles went up the other day, and then joy!! Delivery day was yesterday, and all our tiles, insulation and prefabbed wall frames were dropped off.

Which brings me to the point of my post.

Adam and I are going to write scriptures on the wall frames and the floor before the cladding and tiles go on. I've managed to read through Malachi to Psalms (I went backwards... what of it?) and Revelation through Hebrews. I've go a list a mile long already of wonderful promises and blessings and vows to write throughout our home. I'll be hustling through the rest of the bible over the next few days to glean some more, and then I might do some more detailed searches for words such as dwell, home, abide, peace, house, home, harmony, family, and love.

I was wondering; what verses would you use if you were doing the same thing, and where would you write them? For example, I've got some that will go behind our mirrors in the bathrooms (pslam 34:5), the entry way (Psalm 147:13-14), the kitchen (Ecclesiastes 9:7), the master bedroom (Song of Songs 7:10... amongst others), the laundry (Revelation 22:14), the kids rooms (1 Peter 5:5), the tops of our front doors (Psalm 24:7) and so on and so forth. I'm really interested to hear how you would incorporate scripture into your home this way. Also, what translation would you use? I'm using the ESV, but I'm thinking I might do some searches using the Message.

Tomorrow the verandah is being poured, and then the walls should go up within a day or two after that. We hope to be in a completed house in two months ish, fingers crossed!

Holla

So.

Along with a brand spankin' new computer, (it's so shiny!) I thought I'd unveil and new place for me to write myself down. It's been over a year since I've had my own computer, and oh how I have missed it.

I'm incredibly out of practice. AND, they changed the rules on double spaces after full stops. 

Mind. Blown.

So please excuse me as I stretch and nudge and wriggle to find and fill comfortably this little space of mine. It's been a while since I've stayed in any place for a while... I'm hoping this is home.

For those of you who are patiently following me over from my last blog, thank you for skipping along this path with me. I hope we are swinging hands and picking flowers.